“Change is the only constant.”
~ Heraclitus, Greek philosopher
A quote I have been listening to since standard eight. True to the quotation, life changed many times. And continues to change almost every now and then. Mostly for good.
My decision to take up a data entry operator job immediately after graduating was the first life-changing decision. It was not worth my qualification. I was a Computer Science graduate from the prestigious Delhi University, a DOEACC B Level graduate and had a Master Diploma in Software Technology. I took it up because I wanted to be independent. I took it up because I wanted to continue higher education. I took it up because back home they were hurrying to get me married off. After all, I was nineteen. And most of my cousins (we are 13 girls and 2 boys) had gotten “settled” in their lives by now. I do not regret it. People at work recognized my talent and I was ultimately shifted to a role considering my qualification. I could also complete my masters in computer science. More than anything this job is the one that gave me the necessary exposure to the real world outside home.
The next and may be the boldest decision I took by myself was to walk out with a man who loved me unconditionally. I still remember my Dad’s words after the first time he met him for a few hours.
“I cannot find a better guy for you. He is a gem. But you cannot marry him because he is not from our community. It’ll affect your sister’s life and marital prospects. It’ll affect our reputation in the society.”
I walked out with him because I didn’t want to hurt him, neither did I want to hurt my father. And nor could I imagine having spent my life with someone else. In that case, I would have been cheating everyone including myself. A real struggle it was as we were not accepted by his parents as well. But, as Shakespeare said, all’s well that ends well. After twelve years and having been through the thick and thin of life, I must admit that this was probably the best decision I made in my life. Both set of parents too agree with this now.
Being a mother. Not a first-time mother. But a second time mother even while I was working and had health issues. Purely my choice. And trust me I am really glad that I took it up. Our girls make life complete for us. A home they turned into a heaven. They pour life into this home.
Never in my life had I imagined that I’ll decide to take a sabbatical ever. But I did. Irrespective of criticism from all corners of life. From family and friends. After serving for fifteen long years. It was a tough decision. More than anyone else, for me. It meant putting an end to a regular income. It meant a break in my career. It meant having to cut down on many other things. It meant a lot. But most of all, it meant giving my full time and undivided attention to my family. A workaholic husband and two young daughters whom I have had to leave at the mercy of domestic helps ever since they were about three months old. I weighed the options for three-four years, but ultimately this seemed the wisest decision.
And after four months of being a homemaker, I must confess that I am glad I took it up. The man looks less stressed because he only has to concentrate on his work without worrying about the safety of his girls. The girls are totally loving this period as they get to lie down on their mother’s lap, get stroked, kissed and hugged whenever they want it. They get dropped at and picked up from school by their mom. Instead of a monster mom who always used to scream and shout and order them to sleep early or wake up early or eat fast, she turned out to be a little more patient. They get to choose to go to the park in the evening, or a stroll to the temple, a walk around the market, peaceful study hour, food by choice and time to savour it. It might sound stupid compared to the amount that used to get deposited in my account on the 25th of every month. But to me this experience is much more important than anything else. Peace and love is my income for now.
I haven’t yet decided on the next course of action for myself, but I am sure it will be for good. Change always happens for a reason. Isn’t it?
Waiting to #StartANewLife…
This post has been written for #StartANewLife campaign hosted by https://housing.com/.