How difficult is it to make someone happy?

Sometime back I had written a post, Don’t Praise, But Do Compliment. I’m not sure if you read it or not, but that was written in the context of children. But a compliment I guess works the same way across all age groups.

From a “Good” in your notebook by your English Teacher in Class 1 to a “Well-done!” by the Lab In-Charge, when your experiment results matched the desired results to a “That was good.” or “Perfect!” from your boss, a sincere compliment goes a long way in motivating and inspiring you to be better and better.

In the last week I read at least about a dozen of articles on showering compliments. All this as part of contributing to National Compliment Day which was celebrated on Friday, 24th January, 2014 . I do not believe we need to wait for a day to compliment someone genuinely. But designated days like these are definitely a reminder for many of us.

As the website mentions,

Sincerely-said compliments build our self-esteem and encourage us to keep up the good work.

…through giving of compliments, a positive connection with anyone will be quickly and easily achieved. 

Are those receiving compliments the only ones who benefit? Certainly not! Giving of compliments makes us feel good inside and throws away loneliness. It also forges positive bonds. But these should be given sincerely. It shows the truthfulness of the saying: There is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving.
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In today’s world when social media rules our life more than our loved ones and personal issues are up for sale in public domain than being sorted out within the four walls of your cozy room, dirt is being thrown at each other just for the sake of competing for an imaginary world of power, a sincere compliment goes a long way. Even as I read some beautiful pieces/articles by some great writers whom I love reading, I also read some nasty status updates by some trying to make a mockery of others. 

A compliment from an ex-colleague
A compliment from an ex-colleague

That is exactly when I read this beautiful quote on Tony A Gaskin’s Jr page and shared it with my comments. Never did I imagine in my wildest dreams that such an update would get me a compliment as huge as that. Knowing the person it came from, I know how truthful it is.

When you write, post an update or tweet, you can choose to be honest or extra-sweet or truthful or blunt or rude. Yes. I used ‘or’ because to me each of those have a different meaning. But what one must always remember is our words, even if it is about others, talk more about ourselves than about the ones we write on.

susie
Image Courtesy: A Facebook Page

I woke up around 4 a.m. this morning (thanks to my disturbed sleep pattern over the weekend which I guess is because of the over-excitement about two full days at home), and got to read this beautiful note of appreciation. Life couldn’t have been more happier and content. Is there a more sincere way of appreciating?

Compliment Sindhu
Click on the Image to read the mail

I have no clue of who the sender is and I admit publicly that though she mentions that she is a regular reader of my blog and has commented a few times, I haven’t yet dropped by on her blog. But I promise to do so pretty soon. With all this, isn’t it the most sincere compliment? What touched me more was the fact that I inspired her to write again. I am well aware that what I write is no rocket science, neither are they pieces of wisdom. But yes, I write what I FEEL from the bottom of my heart. And that’s all that matters to me.

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All of these matter to me a lot. But there was one compliment which tops the list. The other day, our office boy whom we envy for the humility he displays, came to me and said,

Madam ji, aap se baat karke bahut achha lagta hai. Ek positive feeling aati hai. Aap hamesha khush rehte ho aur haste rehte ho na isliye.”

(Translation: “Madam ji, it feels good to talk  to you. I get a positive feeling. Because you always remain happy and keep smiling.”)

His words were music to my ears. In our busy schedule, we often forget to make the smallest effort of smiling which can definitely make a lot of difference in someone else’s life apart from our own. That is exactly what my post Spreading Smiles is all about.

There is enough madness, bitterness and negativity all around us, so why not try and wipe out a little and bring about a change in someone’s life by spreading cheers as much as possible. Does that sound like a mammoth task?

Some beautiful and powerful posts that I read over the week:

You can read more stories on sincere complimenting at Celebrate National Compliment Day at Write Tribe by Vidya Sury

And most importantly, try and shower a sincere compliment on someone who deserves it. You’ll only gain their respect and inspire them to be better.

Thank you for taking the time to read! You are my biggest inspiration.

Have a Happy Weekend! 🙂

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23 Replies to “How difficult is it to make someone happy?”

  1. You are correct: a compliment that is based on the truth has a much greater impact on the receiver.
    That was a beautiful compliment from the blogger, not only because the praise is based on the truth (according to me!), but more so because of the honest feedback about the new look of your site.

  2. Absolutely right…compliments spread the smiles and boost the morale…just like motivating tokens of positive energy
    Thanks a lot for mentioning and admiring my post.
    For me your article accomplished the purpose of compliment Day!

  3. This truly was a trademark Rekha post, highlighting all that you feel about the compliments that have come your way recently in the only way in which you know how to, truthfully and lovingly …
    Love the fact that you try to make the world a better place despite the fact that most people around you are cynical, pessimistic and generally troubled with their lives … we really need more people like you around

    1. Thank you so much Jairam! Yes. Truthful it is. I prefer writing exactly what I feel than writing something that the reader might like to read.
      “most people around you are cynical, pessimistic and generally troubled with their lives … ” Insecurity and baseless competition I believe are the root causes for such traits. Wish everyone learn’s to be a good human being more than anything else.
      Thanks for reading!

  4. Rekha, a nice post to read this morning. Indeed compliments are powerful. Often in our race to compete or be the best, we forget to appreciate another. I loved the compliments you shared here from your personal experience. Like you said it makes the giver and the receiver happy. Lovely, positive thoughts!

  5. Compliments paid from the heart are genuine and touch the receiver’s soul enriching the recipient and says volumes about the giver of the compliments. Its not easy for everyone to pay compliments as I have seen troubled minds refusing to accept a good or a better trait in someone else. I am pained to put it down here that a close friend of mine feels that she would be dis-respecting herself if she praised someone else. I do not agree with her nor I made her see my point of view.

    1. Thanks Kalpana ji for reading! There are many souls around just like your close friend. They either feel superior or are insecure and that is exactly why they cannot accept that someone else is good. We can only pray for wisdom for such troubled souls.

  6. Ah! NOW THAT echoes what I said in “Praise Me” 🙂 but does it so much more beautifully. Apropos of complimenting people, Rekha, I feel that it takes a person comfortable in her own skin to be able to praise others. Quite a few people tend to feel that others are so much better than them and must be so aware of how good they are that they are in no need of compliments and it is only they, themselves, who are starving for it. Quite a few others are so wrapped in themselves that they cannot even SEE what there is to compliment in the others.

    1. Well said Suresh Sir! It is lack of confidence in oneself that makes one not accept the good in others. Thanks you so much for the wonderful words! They mean a lot. 🙂

  7. It is indeed easy to make people happy- provided they don’t start dissecting your motives. Very pertinent post Rekha. Hopefully, more people will start paying compliments now that they have proof how much the receivers appreciate them.

    1. Thanks Dagny! I always feel it is only people who cannot see someone become better, who do not compliment or appreciate others. What they do not understand is that this quality of theirs is only increasing the negative energy around them.

  8. Well said Rekha. I guess its the lack of self confidence that makes many hesitate to accept compliments. Btw that was a lovely mail that you got and it was truly well deserved 🙂

    1. Thank you so much for taking time to read Seeta! Very well said. And BTW I hope you’re aware that I love your name immensely. If not, just check out my ‘About Me’ page. 🙂

  9. Such a lovely post , without the intent of being preachy at all Will remeber all these things when I am in a nasty mood .Yes words do make or break a person .After all we don’t live on islands , do we ?

  10. Lovely post, Rekha – you said it so gently and well! I’m not surprised with the emails, the messages and what the office boy told you! You’re a warm and generous woman and I’m glad to know you.

  11. I’m all screwed up. I take criticism more seriously and feel genuinely embarrassed when someone compliments my work. But I do feel, only a large-hearted person is capable of appreciating others 🙂

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